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George Carlin Quotes

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Just 'cause you got the monkey off your back doesn't mean the circus has left town. - George Carlin

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The reason I talk to myself is that I'm the only one whose answers I accept. - George Carlin

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Some people see things that are and ask, 'Why?' Some people dream of things that never were and ask, 'Why not?' - George Carlin

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The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.

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Some people see the glass half full. Others see it half empty. I see a glass that s twice as big as it needs to be.

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When you are born, you get a ticket to the freak show. When you are born in America, you get a front-row seat.

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The reason I talk to myself is because I m the only one whose answers I accept.

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Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesn t mean the circus has left town.

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