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Talladega Nights Quotes

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If you ain't first, you're last. - Ricky Bobby

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I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence. - Ricky Bobby

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Shake and bake! - Ricky Bobby & Cal Naughton, Jr.

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Dear Lord baby Jesus, lyin' there in your ghost manger, just lookin' at your Baby Einstein developmental videos, learnin' 'bout shapes and colors. - Ricky Bobby

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I'm the best there is, plain and simple. I mean, I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence. You know, nobody can hang with my stuff. - Ricky Bobby

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You've got to learn to drive with the fear. There ain't nothin' more frightenin' than drivin' with a live cougar in the car. - Reese Bobby

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I like to think of Jesus as an Ice Dancer, dressed in an all-white jumpsuit, and doing an interpretive dance of my life. - Cal Naughton, Jr.

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Chip, I'm gonna come at you like a spider monkey! - Texas Ranger Bobby

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Well, let me just quote the late-great Colonel Sanders, who said...'I'm too drunk to taste this chicken.' - Ricky Bobby

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I'm gonna scissor-kick you in the back of the head! - Cal Naughton, Jr.

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